September 25, 2008

Break on Through

We're in Ottawa, no thanks to me or the damn Garmin.

Here's what happened. We were heading to Ottawa today, and I got in a snit when mom wanted to use the GPS thingy that she brought.

"I don't need a damn computer telling me how to leave the city, I know how to get off my own street!"
And I proceeded to take us on a very scenic drive off the south end of the island and headed towards the United States border. Oops.

So we took a long detour, and when we tried to use the Garmin, it got worse. We were at an intersection and could go straight or turn left, and it kept telling us to "Turn right". I gave up on it and decided to go with the old stand by - stick to the main roads, which lead to other main roads, which lead to big cities. We eventually found the 201 which at least lead north, then found actual signs that said "Ottawa" and after a mere hour and a half of being lost, we found our hotel.
We went to the National Gallery for a couple hours - free admission tonight. Remember that Heritage Canada commercial that Hetty King narrated, about the teachers in one room schoolhouses - "Its a very difficult passage. It's from the Bible. This is what I use to teach your son to read." And the dour old men look abashed because they can't read....I saw that picture.

And some Picasso's, a Jackson Pollock, Van Gogh's Iris, the Voice of Fire, some of Emily Carr's early work, some Group of Seven paintings and sketches...and then back to the hotel to eat Tim Hortons chili and watch Ugly Betty. It was a mulitcultural day.

The bathroom here is HUGE. Or comparatively so. Our bathroom at home is so small that you could, if you were in a hurry, pee and shave your legs at the same time. Pee in the toilet and shave your legs on the tub, I mean. You always have the option to just pee your pants, but that doesn't save time. The shower here sounds like helicopters and it was giving me imaginary Vietnam flashbacks. Then I got "Break on Through" stuck in my head, because every single movie about Vietnam has that shot of helicopters over the trees and they inevitably play one of three songs - The Doors Break on Through, The Stones Paint it Black, or Fortunate Son by CCR. Sorry, every other musician from the late 60's - apparently you did not capture the soul of the era.

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