Open Letter to Steve,

Dear Steve,

I know you are threatened by the fact that Iggy is taller than you, but PLEASE. For the love of god, pull your head out of your ass, and get to work on something USEFUL. No, attack ads don't count. I know they're fun, but you're like the unpopular kid in high school who somehow managed to get elected class president, and now you're trying to cancel the senior class trip and make science fair mandatory. CUT IT THE FUCK OUT. We all just want to go to Six Flags, and you're ruining everything.

Try to download a new operating system, RoboHarper. Maybe something with Smileys.

You sincerely suck,

Yours truly,
Much of Canada, Except Alberta, They Still Like You For Reasons I Can't Fathom.