The Unbearable Uselessness of Gov't Websites

I've spent too many hours over the last month trying to figure out how to apply for jobs on the federal something or other, 'we hire students cause they work cheap' site. I know I set up a profile with my resume and life history and everything but blood type, cause I don't remember what that is. I know I did this before the deadline, because that doesn't happen til the 30th. I can't tell if the application is sitting in internet limbo, or if I'm registered, if I need to do something else or what. I sure as hell can't apply directly for a job. Unless I just went crosseyed and missed that part. When I click on the "MY JOBS LIST" button, there is nothing there. Which can't be right, because for damn sure I'm at least qualified to be a janitor. I think I just read something that implied in order to get certain jobs I may have to write essays on various topics to prove I can...write English? Communicate effectively? HA! Choke on that irony, government website. Choke and die.

I'll work at McDonalds. I bet I look good in a hairnet.